Appetizer

"Can we table this conversation?"

He asks.

Two glasses of red wine
rest between us.
He plays with the stem
with his stable hand.

I do not respond.

I know he cannot
answer what
I want answered.

I look at him,
overcome with
a sorrow
that the blue of his eyes
does not calm.

"This is the first serious
relationship
I've experienced."

He continues,

"I do not want
my life to feel
settled yet."

As I watch his
lips move
I hear
a different narrative
an unsaid message.

He takes a bite
of the appetizer
in front of us.

It's come before
we've ordered
the main course.

I watch as he
enjoys its taste.
He takes another bite.

"What should we order next?"

He asks, excitedly.

Next?

I want to ask.

Isn't this enough?

Explore

"I want to explore the world,
with you,"

He says, imploring.

"I want to explore this city,
together."

He smiles.

I look at him
at his crystal,
calculating eyes.

"My love,"

I want to say.

"There's only one thing
I want to explore
."

Instead I laugh
placing my arms
around his shoulders.

We stay like this
as he rocks side to side
breathing in my hair.

He heads into the bedroom
signaling the end of
the conversation.

"You,"
I whisper
as he disappears
around the corner.